The Journey Matters: Why Goal Setting Isn’t Just About the Finish Line
Have you ever set a goal and felt the spark of excitement, only to find it dimming after a few weeks? You may be starting the new year determined to change your habits, or with the change of seasons, you've decided it's time for a fresh start. But here's the thing about goal setting: it doesn't have to align with the calendar. Goals can be set whenever it feels right for you. The magic doesn't lie in the date but in the intention.
I remember when I decided to sign up for a Tough Mudder obstacle run—it wasn't January, it was a random day in May, I think. The thought sparked something inside me—probably a mix of excitement and the terrifying realization that I’d just committed to an obstacle run with challenges called “arctic enema” and “electroshock therapy.” At first, my mind was full of the end goal: crossing that muddy finish line, and I wasn't in my best shape. But, as I started training, I realized the journey—the crazy workouts, the small improvements, and even the setbacks—was where the real growth and fun happened. That's the beauty of goal setting: it's about the process as much as the result.
The Sciencey Part to Goal Setting
Goal setting is deeply rooted in psychology. In the 1960s, psychologist Edwin Locke introduced Goal-Setting Theory, showing that specific, challenging goals drive higher performance. Setting goals also boosts dopamine, the feel-good neurotransmitter, creating excitement and motivation.
However, once a goal is achieved, the brain adjusts—a phenomenon called hedonic adaptation—where the initial thrill fades as the achievement becomes the new normal. This is why focusing on the journey, not just the destination, is so important.
Why New Year's Resolutions Often Fail
New Year's resolutions are a classic example of the honeymoon effect in action. Many people start the year with lofty ambitions—to exercise daily, eat healthier, or pick up a new skill—buoyed by the excitement of a fresh start. Research shows that while 77% of people stick to their resolutions for the first week, only 19% keep them for two years. Why? Because the initial excitement wears off, and without a clear plan or realistic expectations, it's easy to lose motivation.
The Power of Intention Setting
Instead of rigid resolutions, try setting intentions. Unlike resolutions, which focus on outcomes, intentions align actions with values and purpose, emphasizing the internal process.
For example, rather than resolving to "lose 20 pounds," set an intention to "nourish my body and move in ways that feel good." This approach fosters self-compassion and flexibility.
To set an intention, ask:
What matters most to me right now?
How do I want to feel as I work toward this goal?
What small steps can I take to align with this intention?
Intentions keep you mindful, present, and focused on who you want to become, not just what you want to achieve.
Starting When You’re Good and Ready (Because Who Needs a Calendar?)
Many people fall into the trap of thinking they need a "perfect" time to set a goal. January 1st, or the first day of a new season, often feel like a clean slate, but the truth is, the right time is when you're ready. Ask yourself:
What do I want to achieve?
Why is this important to me right now?
What small step can I take today to move closer to this goal?
When I trained for that Tough Mudder, it wasn't about waiting for the special date. It was about taking the first step. Your goals can begin any day you choose. The important part is to start.
Changing Your Goals Without Feeling Like a Quitter
Let's bust another myth: you're not locked into a goal forever once you set a goal. Life changes, and so can your goals. You may set out to learn a new language but discover that what you really wanted was to travel more. Or perhaps you started a fitness journey and realized it's not about weight loss but about feeling stronger and healthier.
Changing your goal doesn't mean you've failed; you're growing. Give yourself permission to pivot when needed. Reflect regularly
Is this goal still meaningful to me?
Am I enjoying the process?
What's working, and what isn't?
How to Handle Bumps in the Road
Every journey has its bumps. It's easy to feel discouraged when you hit an obstacle, but obstacles aren't roadblocks—they're part of the process. Here are some strategies to stay on track:
Break It Down: If your goal feels overwhelming, break it into smaller, manageable steps. Instead of saying, "I'll write a book," start with, "I'll write 500 words daily."
Plan for Challenges: Think about potential obstacles and how you'll handle them. If you're trying to save money but love dining out, plan one "treat meal" a week instead of cutting it out completely.
Celebrate Small Wins: Recognize progress along the way. Every step forward is an accomplishment worth celebrating.
Seek Support: Share your goals with family or friends who can hold you accountable and cheer you on. Community and connection make a difference.
So, You Hit Your Goal, Now What?
The moment you achieve a goal can feel incredible, but it's not uncommon to experience a sense of "What now?" afterward. Don't let hedonic adaptation set in. When I finished Tough Mudder, I didn't stop exercising, I gave myself a new goal. To avoid feeling empty after achieving a goal, consider these tips:
Reflect on Your Journey: Take time to appreciate the growth and effort.
Set a New Goal: Keep the momentum going by setting a new goal, whether it builds on the previous goal or takes you in a new direction.
Share Your Experience: Inspire others by sharing what you learned.
Why It's About the Journey
Let's revisit that idea of focusing on the journey. When we're overly fixated on the outcome—whether it's a number on a scale, a promotion, or hitting a milestone—we risk missing the beauty of the process. The journey is where resilience, patience, and self-discovery happen.
For example, someone who wants to lose 20 pounds might think the goal will bring happiness. But along the way, they might discover the joy of cooking healthy meals, the empowerment of completing a challenging workout, fitting into those jeans that have been hanging in the closet, or the confidence that comes from showing up for themselves consistently. The weight loss becomes secondary to the lifestyle changes and self-belief they've cultivated.
Takeaway: Start Small, Stay Flexible, and Celebrate
At Mingle & Marvel, we believe in the power of goal-setting and personal growth. Our coaching programs are here to support you in turning your aspirations into progress. What goal have you been considering? Today could be the perfect day to start, or three months from now. Remember, the best goals shape who you become—take small steps, stay consistent, adapt, and celebrate every win. We're here to cheer you on!
Oh, and in case you’re wondering—yes, I did finish the Tough Mudder. Was I covered head-to-toe in mud? Absolutely. Did I look graceful doing it? Not a chance and crossing that finish line, I felt like a warrior… And I was proud, not just for finishing, but for showing up for myself and sticking with it, even when it got tough.